Bill Cosby
I said to a guy, I said, "Tell me, what is it about cocaine that makes it so wonderful?", and he said, "Well, it intensifies your personality." I said, "Yes, but what if you're an asshole?"

Coco Chanel
Since everything is in our heads, we had better not lose them.

Dave Barry
Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night

Charles Bukowski
Nothing is worse than to finish a good shit, then reach over and find the toilet paper container empty. Even the most horrible human being on earth deserves to wipe his ass

George Eliot
A difference of taste in jokes is a great strain on the affections.

Gilbert K. Chesterton
It is the test of a good religion whether you can joke about it.

Samuel Beckett
for dream is nothing, a joke, and significant what is worse.

Samuel Beckett
My life, my life, now I speak of it as of something over, now as of a joke which still goes on, and it is neither, for at the same time it is over and it goes on, and is there any tense for that?

Woody Allen
And how does gravity work? And if it were to cease suddenly, would certain restaurants still require a jacket?

Woody Allen Quote - Eternal nothingness is O.K. if you're dressed for it. -
Woody Allen
Eternal nothingness is O.K. if you're dressed for it.